Thank you for that explanation of the sticky situation of white people needing safe spaces as part of the learning process.

It's something I've really struggled with. I am ashamed to admit that I really only came around to true allyship during very intense critical race theory workshops for a nonprofit I worked with.

The nonprofit did exactly that--split us into content groups of white and POC for certain discussions. And that's exactly where I said the things I was afraid to say (and be challenged on) in a more diverse setting. Somehow, being corrected by other white people made it feel less confrontational. Like, "I can see why you think that, but I have the same racial background as you do, and have you ever thought..."

Since then, I've been able to spend the last 7ish years slowly doing better and making an effort to listen to POC. And in theory, providing "white only" spaces sounds exactly antithetical to the mission.

In theory, we should be able to listen to POC and get it the first time. But the sad psychology is that we don't. We often need our hands held as we learn about active anti-racism, and it is absolutely not the responsibility of POC to provide that for us.